An Elegant Wallflower

I kept practicing for months,
Before mirror,
Every night behind the shut bathroom doors;
I assumed:
Talking to my nude self,
Would give me extra courage,
To face you and say the matters of my heart;

Day in,
Day out,
As I kept practicing,
I kept growing – stronger,
And stronger,
Then after a lifetime,
Finally the moment came,
When you were right in front of me,
Much more beautiful than you were in my dreams,
I swear, I could tell that only by your smell;

And the words choked in my gullet,
Before I could speak,
Or squeak,
And eyes suddenly grew fifty pounds heavier,
As it became harder to move the eyeballs,
To get my retinas up to meet yours;
You were so damn beautiful,
That I couldn’t dare looking up,
To your face;

Perhaps,
I knew, if I did,
My heart will beat in my mouth,
My eyes will get stuck to your lips,
Making me feel nude,
(Not that I wasn’t feeling already,
But then I wondered:
What would be beyond nudity?)
And merely by looking,
At my dry hungry lips,
You will node,
(I was so sure about it,
Because that was why you were there,
In the first place,
After all,)

And I felt so weak,
That staying that way,
Felt like real courage.

I’m sorry,
I didn’t feel strong to surrender,
I couldn’t let your beauty ruin me.

- rustymermaid.deviantart.com
– rustymermaid.deviantart.com

Image Artist: Rusty Mermaid

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